January 13, 2014

Rage Against The Rage!

I was thinking about writing a throwaway post for today, but alas, I respect you too much to do that to you. So without further ado, or fanfare, we present to you, not the Monday Morning anthem, which in my world is this:

but a post about rage.

That's right boys and girls rage.

We've all experienced rage from time to time, but did you know that there's all kind of rage that you can bath in and experience? Rage that is custom designed for whatever you do during your hour-to-hour existence.

We'll skip the traditional road rage as most of us know what the serious end result of road rage can be, but suffice to say, we have involuntarily experienced it throughout our lives. We'll also skip 'roid rage too, since I don't think anyone here has experienced that frightening prospect up close and personal.

As for everything else, let me expound and expand on what kind of rage you can experience and claim for your very own.

There's Dealing With Stupid Rage, which is usually occurs when you're dealing with co-workers who make at least 1 1/2 times your salary yet are dumb as dirt when it comes to understanding basic instructions. You have E-Mail Rage, which goes hand in hand with Dealing With Stupid.  This comes about when your main involuntary choice of work communication is e-mail, and the most visible system is yelling at your computer while composing a response to the e-mail in question. The important thing to remember is that what you're composing should not reflect what you're actually yelling. Failure to follow that rule simply shows that you're stooping down to that level.

You have Phone Rage, which also goes hand in hand with E-Mail Rage and Dealing With Stupid Rage. You have Public Sector Union Rage, which happens when you're dealing with the self centered public sector unions. You have Guv'ment Rage, which happens if your boss is the guv'ment and you're the only one who understands the concept of "fiscal restraint".

You have Fax Machine Rage, Elevator Rage and Parking Lot/Garage Rage.

You have Rage Against The Machine Rage, which happens when  you try to reconcile the decent music that they had with their certifiably reprehensible extreme left of center political viewpoints, such as their support for convicted cop killer and left wing media darling Mumia Abu Jamal. I've always found their support, as well as the Hollywood Left's support of this despicable human being, disgusting. But I suppose they won out in the end as his sentence was commuted to life imprisonment.

You have Computer Rage, which we've all experienced on almost daily basis. You have Faux Liberal Rage, Faux Conservative Rage and What The Hell Were You Thinking Rage.

You have Rage In The Cage Rage, which is when the radio station that you're listening to plays that song continuously whenever they want to play anything from J. Geils (unless it's Valentine's Day, then they play this):

One of my personal favorite rages is Scrub Rage. This usually comes about whenever I happen to listening to the radio while driving around (which is all the time) and they play a well known song that is at least 25+ years old that they've scrubbed an "offensive" word from. Example, the other day was listening to WHUS (UCONN) 91.7 FM and they were playing the song "Money For Nothing" by Dire Straits. Now we all know that back in the 70's/80's/early 90's, certain songs contained certain words that today's wimps find objectionable, so they scrub them out. The problem with scrubbing is that by removing the word you change the rhythm/flow of the song. Such was the case with this song as they removed the word "faggot" from the song. Now, say what you will about that particular word, but to me, by scrubbing the word out, you made that word more powerful than it should be.

Anyways, those are but a few examples of the many, many, many types of rage that you can experience throughout your daily lives. However, you should always be careful if you should happened to be touched by a given type of rage, don't let it take control your life. Instead, embrace it, embalm it, covet it, and swallow it, before getting rid of it by any means necessary, preferably means that don't get you into trouble.

(c) 2014 by G.B. Miller. All Rights Reserved.


  1. I actually have seen roid rage in person. Some bro at the gym was angry that his bench press weights weren't staying in place and he threw the whole thing on the floor. Sounded like an explosion.

    Having worked in IT, I know computer rage all too well. One dude tried to tell me before that his keyboard was broken and he needed another one because he dropped it and it accidentally snapped in half. And totally had nothing to do with his program not working, which he also needed me to fix.

    Yeah, connect the dots.

  2. You left out numb rage. That is when the howling rage has gone so long you are no longer involved. You are simply on the outside looking in at the lunatics pretending to solve your problem and you no longer remember the issue.

  3. ABfTS: Scary indeed that guy in the gym.

    To snap a keyboard in two requires a short fuse that ignites a serious backdraft of frustration.

    G.A.: I'll have to remember that one as I don't think I've experienced that...oh wait, yes I did. With my 12 1/2 year old daughter the other night.

  4. Embalm it! HAHA!

    Seriously, they bleeped Dire Straits? What would they do with NWA?

  5. Bearman: Then you are one of the chosen few in the world.

    M: Yeah, I thought you might get a kick out of that one.

    Yup, they bleeped Dire Straits, and as for NWA, I would think you would hear just one long bleep punctuated by a word here and there.

  6. One of my favorite songs from Rage Against the Machine is Karma Police, and I think that's the last one I really loved.

  7. Lynn: Two of my personal faves are "Guerilla Radio" and "Killing In The Name Of".

    Like I said, they got good music, but their political bent leaves me in a serious quandary.


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