May 21, 2015

Still Yet Another Tale Of Non-Smartness

This tale of non-smartness is brought to you through the generosity of my co-workers, without whom I wouldn't be searching for a pair of zircon-encrusted tweezers in which to pluck my growing mop of hair (yes, I do have hair. someday I may even take a picture of me with it).

Lately, there are days in which sometimes I feel like this:


Bonus points if you can guess which character I feel like right about now.

Anywho, we'uns counting down the days/hours/minutes/seconds to when we turn the big:
 50

in six days.  And to put it mildly, it's got me a little worried, Not so much that I'm becoming middle aged, but that I'm not expriencing some juvenile mid-life crisis of ginormous proportions.

Oh yeah, SURE , it's marvy to act like a juvenile deliquent, get myself a serious toupee, buy a $50K car, get me the blondest bimbo that God has ever put on this earth and act like a jackass.

But yanno, all actually wanted to get for myself this year for my 50th, was one of two things: ink or a smartphone. My friends, if you saw the kind of phone I got now, you would be pointing and during your bast imitation of Johnny Mac.

But, alas, being the Johnny-on-the-spot all-around-good-egg that wife always expects me to be, I let her get the smartphone instead. And just like a kid who spent five hours in a candy store inhaling enough sugar to build a four lane highway, my wife is now in her happy place with this phone.

Which leaves me in a not-so-happy place, in that there is only one option left for me: ink.

Now you might think I'm delirious, with the fact that I would want to do a little something to myself. But I've given this a lot of thought, and even talked to my doctor about this (being a diabetic ya know, there all kinds of things I have to worry about). However, there is one person left that I still have to talk to/convince of my desire to get a little ink.

The wife.

The wife is very much against this (actually, I think she's against the idea of tats in general), so I have my work cut out for me. While it took me quite a while to convince her that I wanted to shave my head (yes, I wanted to get my wife's blessing on that), I've been working on this issue for even a longer period of time.

But, this, as they say, is how I want to deal with turning a Grant greenback this year. I want to get something that not only celebrates me, but my family as well. The design I want to get is really simple & unique: The letter "J" with the number "3" in superscript, followed by the years my family was born ('62, '92, '01). The letter "J' is symbolic that the rest of my family has first names that start with that particular letter.

And that my friends, is my tale of non-smartness. Or smartness, depending on your point of view.

(c) 2015 by G.B. Miller. All Rights Reserved.

14 comments:

  1. I think that's a GREAT idea for a tat! I hope your wife relents.

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    1. I'm hoping so too. Like I said, I have my work cut out for me. Getting her to agree is the hard part. Money will be the easy part.

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  2. I considered getting a tat for a long time but could never find anything I really wanted to live with.

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    1. I've been toying with the idea for quite a while, but was always leery of doing it because I'm a diabetic. I basically got the okay from my doctor, so it's the wife I have to work on.

      This design is something I can live with. A picture is not.

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  3. Very brave of you GB! And every woman will want you for their husband for letting your wife have a smartphone and not you - you've definitely clocked up some brownie points :)
    Enjoy 50 - it's not so bad … well nothing starts falling off immediately anyway ;)

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    1. Thankee. Not so much brownie points as piece of mind. That, my friend, is priceless.

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  4. Sweet! That is a cool present. I got my first tattoo as a late 20th b.day present to myself. I have three and don't want to overdo it, but I think I want to get one more.

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    1. For me, one and done. I don't mind tats on a woman (kind of hot in a nerdy way) but I agree there has to be limit of some kind.

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  5. It was my intention to get a tattoo when I was in California this past August but came away bare. I have regretted not going through with it because I am retired and it is not like I plan to be job hunting or anything. However I do love my first smart phone that I got at the same time. It is my best friend.

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    1. Welcome back Ms. Granny!

      I intend to go through with it in some way, shape or form. And I'll probably get a smart phone too, some day.

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  6. I would never get a tattoo myself, I don't think, because my fashion tastes are too changeable. However, if you are sure that it's something you will enjoy for the rest of your days, I can't think of a better celebration for your 50th birthday. Good luck!

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    1. Getting a tattoo is very much a personal choice, so I can respect someone who choses not to get one. And I thank you for the best wishes

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  7. A Facebook friend of mine turned 50 and got a motorcycle. Then he got a girlfriend. Problem? He was already married. He's divorced now and blasting pictures of him with his new girlfriend (who has young kids). Tell your wife the tattoo is probably one of the tamest things a man can do when he turns 50!

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    1. I'm sorry to hear about your FB friend going through such a bad version of a mid-life crisis.

      I agree that this definitely pales in comparison.

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