October 4, 2015

I Are Agressive

There are two kinds of phone calls that one receives throughout one's busy day: calls from people you like (i.e. family & friends) and calls from people you don't like (everybody else). More often than not, I have a tendency to get the latter, be it on my personal phone or work phone.

Today's post is about a call featuring both phones.

When it comes to answering phone calls from people I don't like, my default phone manner is super aggressiveness, specifically, sugary-sweet to the point of making anyone with earshot desperately chew it back.

This past Thursday (10/1), I received a phone call from Ally, the super smart folks who handle my my perpetually late car payments. Now, I'm very used to getting phone calls and letters from them about my perpetually late car payments, and frankly, it doesn't bother me. I always abuse the grace period given because when you're functioning with one paycheck, you learn quickly to prioritize your bills.

Anyways, back to the phone call.

October 1, 2015

Back Am I And Presents To Be Had By None I Not Bring!

Yeah, I know. My post titles are getting stranger and stranger. You know, after writing some 1500+ posts in 8 1/2 years, the first thing to really go is coherent post titles. Digging down into the dry well-water depths of originality, fervently hoping for something good, but ultimately pulling out seriously obscure poppyseed culture references is never a good thing.


I have returned to the blog world none the worst for wear and I do bring some tidings of good news. While I was away from the blog world, my MOBI files came through, and after some annoying fiddling around (having to add yet a 3rd financial account for my writings), I was able to upload this to the Kindle world of fun:

The good thing? Why, it's available for pre-order as we speak from Amazon. Get yours now before it goes on sale to the general public on October 7th.

The other good thing? It ain't enrolled in any of the KDP select programs that require me to yank it from Smashwords, so I does feel good about this. I was able to bypass that particular section none-the-worse for wear.

The bad thing? I belatedly realized about two hours after I had uploaded, that the wrong price was attached to it. So I had to wait for the first version to be approved before I could change the price, then had to re-submit for re-approval.

In other super-exciting news, I discovered what I can comfortably add to my story w/o suffering hand fatigue: roughly 475 words, give or take, per sitting. Which comes out to roughly a page and a half of typed text. In other really super-exciting news, I discovered how much I had really grown as a writer. I originally wrote this thing about seven years ago or so, and the scene that finishes chapter one (making out in the shower), went on for almost 4 pages.

Yes, four very long and tedious pages that read like a very bad porn script (I should save this and see I can rewrite for a submission to an adult movie company). So, this past Tuesday, I managed to take those four tedious pages and cut it down to exactly one and a half pages of readable text. So, as it was said in a Bugs Bunny cartoon, "Three cheers and a tiger for me, I have won!"

And finally, in really ultra super-exciting news, the eye surgery went remarkably well, in that the entire appointment lasted about 1 1/2 hours. The wife managed to walk me back to the car w/o a hitch, because I really didn't want open my eye any longer than necessary. And I spent a lovely Monday sitting in the backyard snoozing, which was momentarily marred when the wife scared the daylights out me by waking me up. If you recall previously, I discussed about residing in that between land while sleeping, when you become completely confused the moment you involuntarily wake up. Other than that, a good time was guaranteed for all.

And now, I'm back in the saddle again, so if I was you, I would do what the band in the video says:

(c) 2015 BOOKS BY G.B. MILLER. All Rights Reserved.

September 28, 2015

I Are Not Here Too

Time now for the medical portion of Father Nature's Corner. For those of you who can't stand the thought of descriptive medical fun, you can skip the next few paragraphs, but be sure come back for the last, because just like Kermit The Frog, we have a late breaking news story.

Two weeks ago, I had willingly participated in part one of laser surgery for my one and only eye. Two hours of fun that surrounded 15 minutes with of pain and aggravation, which was soon followed by a day off with more pain that you could possibly shake a stick at. We followed that up by going back to work like a dolt the next day, only to suffer from a pain that could be described as, "stupid you, for going back to work early, now you're gonna pay for it."

Fast forward to now.

Now is pre-op, as in we scheduled a vacation day right after the surgery day, so I can spend the day wallowing in the beautiful Indian Summer and most importantly, not turn into a big baby pain in the ass for my wife.

Which brings us to the point of this post: I will once again go on a short cyber hiatus. My scheduled return date to the blog world is Wednesday night, although I will spend those off days making brief appearances on Facebook to post a few more travelouge pics from Brazil (got a few already, but you know me, I'm a stickler for actually identifying the people in the pic so as to give a proper credit), so as to pump up sales or at the very least get me some hits on my Amazon page. And like before, the comments will be hanging ten until Wednesday night.

In the meantime, enjoy this musical interlude by the ska/rock band The Hippos with the song "Paulina" (if you can find the c.d., by all means, please check it out, 'cause it really rocks).

(c) 2015 BOOKS BY G.B. MILLER. All Rights Reserved.

September 24, 2015

Life: It's A Box Car!

Sometimes, when you got nuttin' to blog about, you simply fall back on the tried and true, and hope for the best.

Poppy Culture and The Written Word.

Poppy Culture:

I listen to some truly strange music, especially artists who I consider to be my secret musical crush. You know, those artists that you love to listen to yet if anyone knew you actually listened to them, you be hoisted up a flag pole with a turban wedgie.

One of my secret musical crushes:

The Written Word:

Let's see, let's see, let's see. Ah yes, the written word. Well sir (or ma'am), it's like this. Haven't done any new writing this week 'cause work has been a major female of the canine species. Yes, I know, an unclean choice of words, but ya know, I do respect all my readers of both sexes, and while using THAT WORD in a story could be appropriate from time to time, using THAT WORD in a blog post that's located on a high end PG-13 blog would be inappropriate. So, we used an euphemism instead. I'm hoping to do some writing this weekend or early next week while I'm recovering from session #2 of eye surgery.

In other exciting news, I'm Kindlizing these:

I'm hoping to get them back later this week, so I can get them primed for an October 1st release. In the meantime, if print is your bag, please check out my Amazon page or my book blog for details.

In related news, a good friend from high school, who I reconnected with on Facebook (see, it's good for sumthin'), bought a couple of copies of the aforementioned books to take with him on his trip to Brazil. He also offered to do a travelogue with them, like the Travelocity gnome, and post the pictures on my FB page. So here is the first pic of A Taste Of Pain hanging ten at the Orlando airport.

Pretty cool, eh?

More pics featuring my books hanging ten with cool people at cool places in Brazil coming soon to Facebook, and quite possibly the blog world as well.

(c) 2015 BOOKS BY G.B. MILLER. All Rights Reserved.

September 21, 2015

Life: It's A Little Joe!

Got too much crappola happening these days to properly triangulate a good post, but it's a Moanday (yes, yes, yes, OMG, yes!), so I needs to come up with something mildly entertaining.

First, a seriously short update on things:

1} Sent my books to be Kindled, so look for an announcement in October about it.
2} Added another 550 words to my latest epic non-fail.
3} Son turned 23 (23!) yesterday. Is finally realizing that as a guy, you will only win the battles with the girlfriend that she lets you win.
4} Work is work. To read an extended rant about it, please check my Tumblr blog.

Now, onto bigger and better things.

Once again, we uploaded yet another wickedly short and positively sleep inducing or mind settling video for your enjoyment. This one, like this one here, is of the same group of feathered friends that we shot over the July 4th holiday. And like the other, is about a minute long. Enjoy!

(c) 2015 BOOKS BY G.B. MILLER. All Rights Reserved.